Recapturing Teen Wolf: Lighting the Beacon!

Previously on Teen Wolf… Jennifer is the Darach and she’s apparently the only one that can save Cora who is dying for an unknown reason. Also Jennifer took the Sheriff and Melissa and Scott went with Deucalion leaving Stiles alone at the hospital with an unconscious Derek.

Stiles frantically slaps an unconscious Derek – I guess he’s too panicked to remember his resuscitation techniques from last week’s episode. Shame. The shear desperation in Stiles voice as he screams Derek’s name is giving me far too many feelings for this early in an episode. He makes a fist because hey last time he was practically straddling an almost dead Derek punching him worked (plus we established earlier this season that they are both fans of a good fisting).

Shoot me down and bury me in a world where Stile is on top of Derek all the time.

Before Stiles's fist reaches Derek’s face Derek’s eye open and he catches Stiles's wrist. They look at each other in aw for a moment. Stiles is shocked that Derek woke up and Derek is surprised that Stiles stuck around to try to help him… but their not really because their relationship has definitely reached the stage where they are not going to leave each other for dead.

Derek: Where is she?

Stiles: Jennifer? Gone with Scott’s mom.

Derek: She took her?

Stiles: Yeah and if that’s not enough of a kick to the balls Scott left with Deucalion Okay so we got to get you out of here. The police are coming right now and we’ve got to get you the hell out of here.

When people ask what I love about this dynamic – and I’m talking as it is on the show at the moment – and I always say it’s the way that communicate. It’s the way they talk to each other. That conversation is perfunctory, it’s there to remind the audience what happened last week and move us into this weeks drama. But here’s the thing, a conversation like that wouldn’t have worked with any of the other characters.

Stiles and Derek – they verbally abuse each other and they have that whole screwball banter thing going on at times but when it comes to exchanging key information, it's easy. It’s no nonsense because they just get each other. No that’s the wrong way to put it because that sounds romantic but it’s not (not in this instance). They understand each other and I mean literally understand. Every person had their own personal language; combining use of words, gestures, inflection, and Stiles and Derek are able to translate each other’s personal language easily. I don’t even know if that makes sense but I am fully prepared to get a bunch of anonymous messages accusing me of wearing Sterek goggles but they are on the same wave length and that makes conversations between them useful narrative wise. 

Well in for a penny, in for a pound because I am actually loving Stiles and Derek this season. Even though I’m about 85% sure it’s accidental (I’m sorry Jeff I’m just not entirely sure you still have control over this story). Their dynamic this season is pretty much exactly what I wanted – so thanks Teen Wolf for giving me something that I wanted even though I’m not sure it’s something you wanted to give.

Oh yeah, you're allies now. Don't fight it Derek. Just go with it. 

Stiles helps Derek get up while placing a reassuring hand on Derek’s shoulder because apparently that’s their thing now.

Why do people keep trusting Peter? 

Outside Isaac is in the car with Peter and a still unconscious Cora (poor poor Cora) there’s no sign of the twins but they can see the Argents though. There’s a howl and Chris says that it indicates retreat because he’s just an expert on all things. Then Isaac is his usual diplomatic self.

Isaac's the kind of person you never bring to a family dinner. Or you do, depending on how much you hate your family

Isaac: Not to bring up uncomfortable memories. Wasn’t the last time you saw them the time they saw you kill Kate and burned you alive.

Apparently it was because when Isaac turns around to look at Peter he’s gone, the car door left swinging open like a cartoon. Isaacs all shit because he probably should have known Peter would abandon him – but I have no sympathy for any of you because you all know better yet you still trust Peter. It’s your own faults.

Beautiful danger

Isaac jumps out of the car and meets the Argents. Allison wants to know where Scott and Stiles are (because he pack is her top priority, this episode has a lot of original McCall pack feelings, be prepared). Then Derek arrives and goes straight for Cora because we are just supposed to instinctually understand that she is his top priority even though we never saw their relationship develop.

Derek: Stiles is still at the hospital, he’s gonna hold off the cops for us.

No Isaac lost his new family! Isaac NOOOOOO! 

Urgh I just love it when they communicate. They have to get the hell out of there. Derek also tells them that Jennifer took Melissa but he can’t bring himself to say what happened to Scott.

Inside the hospital Stiles is sitting alone in the waiting room chairs – which is a whole lot sadder once you get to the end of the episode because okay yeah, no. The police are there, including a very important looking man in a suit. His badge tells us he’s FBI but if Supernatural has taught me anything it’s not to trust those badges. Stiles roles his eyes, he knows this guy.

FBI Guy: Listen here you little shit.

FBI Guy: A Stilinski at the center of this mess, what a shocker. You think you can answer some questions without the usual level of sarcasm?

Stiles: If you an ask the questions without the usual level of stupid.

Stiles: What was that about my shit?

And oh yeah, these two definitely have a history. The question is what history. FBI guy wants to know where the Sheriff is, which fair enough because he is the towns law enforcement. But what he says next is totally uncalled for.

FBI Guy: Is he drinking again?

Stiles: What do you mean ‘again’? He never had to stop.

FBI Guy: But he did have to slow down. Is he drinking like he used to?

There is nothing about this conversation that is not completely heartbreaking, and also a perfect example of how to give us a whole bunch of information is a short amount of time. In a short conversation we know that Stiles knows this FBI Agent, and that he doesn’t like him. The FBI agent also knows Stiles, and knows that Stiles doesn’t like him. We learnt that the FBI Agent has a history with the Sheriff and that their history is not a good one. It’s also been confirmed used to drink, although he wasn’t officially an alcoholic. But it’s pretty clear that there’s something else hidden in this relationship. You see Jeff, you can do this when you try so there is no excuse.

Stiles: All right how bout this? Next time I see him I’ll give him a field sobriety test. We’ll do the alphabet, start with F and end with U.

Oh burn! Nice one Stiles. Stiles tells the FBI guy that he has no idea what happened because he was stuck in the elevator the whole time (I read that fic too Stiles). FBI Guy seems to believe him when he asks if Stiles was the one that put the name on the doors.

Have none of these people heard of email?

Spray painted (I hope it’s spray paint and not blood) on the doors of the elevator is a name: Argent. Dun dun dun!

Opening Credits.

At the loft, Cora is still dying and Derek is still sitting by her bedside lamenting the potential loss of a relationship we have not been shown at all. Do we even know what’s wrong with her? We’re assuming it was Jennifer but do we know that? Speaking of relationships we have not been shown. Isaac is very upset by Cora's sickness and is finally calling Derek out on his terrible life choices.

That is where the sex happened yes. 

Isaac: While Scott and Stiles were out there trying to help people from getting killed you were in here rolling around in the sheets with the actual killer. 

Woah there, hold up Isaac. Maybe he was just trying to keep her busy – plus you guys know that Derek makes terrible decisions so from now on I am blaming everyone any time you allow Derek to make a decision on his own or with help from Peter.

Isaac: Do you get how many people she’s killed? Erica and Boyd are dead. Cora is dying and you are doing nothing!

Okay yeah you have a point there, Isaac. Also jinx because I wanted to yell that exact same thing at Jeff last week. Traumatic events are not traumatic is we don’t get to see the impact Jeff.

Isaac: Why’d you do this to us Derek? Was it all about the power? Were you bored? Were you lonely?

Ding, ding, ding. You are correct with all three Isaac. Well, I do genuinely think he honestly believed that nonsense about the bite being a gift so part him did think he was helping you Isaac. But he also wanted power and he was lonely and bored. And also Isaac continues to say things I would like to say to Jeff.

Isaac: You're not my real Alpha Derek.

Derek finally looks at Isaac and it’s the look of a man who is about 5000% done with this storyline. I know Hoechlin looks beautiful when his face is all intense (and I’m pretty sure that’s the only expression he knows how to make) but let’s give Derek a little light and shade next season… if only for the good of the story because this whole manpain upon manpain thing is getting really old.

Isaac sighs and walks away. Derek promised to stay with Cora. Once he helps her, he’ll help the others and again this might mean something IF WE KNEW ANYTHING ABOUT DEREK’S RELATIONSHIP WITH CORA!

Isaac: You can sit here and perfect the art of doing nothing.

Isaac out! Peter in. Oh no, who left an emotionally vulnerable easily manipulated Othello alone with Iago again? This is going to end terribly. Apparently Isaac’s using anger an excuse for shifting his allegiance from Derek to Scott. Wait didn’t this happen at the start of the season? IDEK.

Derek is contemplating another terrible life choice.

At the Argent apartment Stiles is with Allison and Chris because he literally has no where else left to go and I’m sorry but Stiles general existence in this episode has me emotionally compromised. Allison is trying to convince her father that he is the next target but Chris is being all self-deprecating and questioning his guardian credentials. Stiles is like well someone wrote your name in big red letter’s, that’s a pretty big clue.

Have I ever told you how much I want hunter Stiles? 

Allison suggests that Morrell might know something – it might have been her that left the message. Stiles thinks she should probably try harder at the helping thing because the lunar eclipse is less than two days away… wait when did Stiles know about the lunar eclipse?

Chris: (to Stiles) Don’t give up hope.

*cuddles screen protectively*

Stiles has pretty much already give up hope. If he has any hope left it’s only a tiny thread that is being held together by continued forward momentum. He needs to keep doing this or he’s going to give up. Chris doesn’t think that the Sheriff is dead... yet anyway. 

Chris: There’s something about Jennifer’s tactics, it’s like she’s still positioning. Still moving pieces into place.

Allison: And you’re one of them.

Then it’s research time and we’re back on the telluric currents. Also Chris most definitely needs Stiles help – which is not true but it’s a nice thing to say because Stiles really needs to feel useful at the moment. A+ parenting Chris! 

Stiles: You seriously want to go after her. What if she just takes you like the others? Huh? No offence but what’s the difference between you and them.

Porn! 

Chris pulls out a gun because he’s not like any of those other dads, he’s a cool dad that is not afraid to shoot Jennifer in the head… a lot. Damn the way that man handles a gun should come with a warning.

Stiles: Where do we start?

They start with the locations they have used before because it would be too expensive and a confusing to introduce a new location at this stage. So it’s between the school, the animal clinic and the bank vault. They haven’t been to the bank vault in a little while so it’s probably there because Deaton didn’t die or something. Whatever I just really like it when they strategize together around maps. Then Allison suggests Lydia could help – because no one loves Lydia like Allison loves Lydia.

Important information... and maps.

Chris: Lydia? What can she do?

Stiles: Lydia’s got sort of a talent. She somehow ended up finding a couple of the bodies, umm, without actually looking for them.

Chris: What is she psychic?

Stiles: She’s something.

They are big on the repetition this season but I actually don’t mind this one – as long as it’s actually heading somewhere – like Lydia being the hero I’ve always known she was.

You can take my pain Derek. 

Back at the loft, Cora is still dying and Derek is taking some of her pain. I know this is all supposed to be very emotional but I’m just not invested in this storyline. Derek’s t-shirt is nice though. Very nice. It would look nicer on the floor but I’ll take what I can get. Peter tells Derek to be careful and Derek says that he knows that if he goes to far it could kill him (he doesn’t care about dying and who can blame him, his life is the worst). Except apparently that’s not what Peter meant.

At the Argent apartment, Chris and Allison are pulling out an arsenal worth of weapons as Stiles looks on with awe and arousal.

Stiles is both intimidated and aroused. 

Stiles: I thought you guys were retired?

Chris: Retired yes, defenseless no.

Chris asks Allison and Stiles to let him know if they hear from Scott but neither of them seem to think that’s likely. It says a lot about both their characters that they have pretty much given up on Scott.

Chris: Both of you try to remember he’s just doing what he thinks is right.

And my axe... I mean claws. 

Excellent point Chris, my thoughts exactly. Then Isaac turns up to offer his claws to the mix of available weapons.

Peter is talking to Derek, which as I said above is generally a terrible idea. He’s explaining that there is something, that only an alpha can do, that might be able to save Cora. He also says some stuff about wolves and caring for injured members of the pack and chewing and regurgitating food.

Just tell him the stupid idea Peter, he's gonna do it anyway. 

Derek: If you’re trying to tell me I can save her, just tell me.

Thank you Derek, that was getting ridiculously. Take it away Peter, let’s hear your perfectly reasonable and completely trustworthy idea.

He needs his space to monologue jeeze Derek. 

Peter: It’s that spark of power that makes you can alpha. When you take her pain she draws on the power that provides you with those special gifts. The power that heightens your sense, your strength. The power that transforms your body. As an alpha you have that bit of extra. That spark that intensifies the color of your eyes from a bright yellow into a searing red.

* sighs dramatically * Why did you have to say ‘spark’ Jeff? I am already so over the fandom’s obsession with spark Stiles and now they’re going to go crazy about spark Sterek. * groans *

Derek eats up Peter’s words like the idiot that he is, because it’s totally reasonable to believe that Peter has Cora’s best interests at heart. When Scott becomes Derek’s alpha the first rule should be that Derek is never allowed to be left alone with Peter, ever.

Totally trustworthy, as trustworthy as a shakespearian villain. 

It might not work, but Derek doesn’t care. He has to save his one-dimensional plot device sister. Peter gives this look that suggests Derek is playing right into his hands and if all of this doesn’t turn out to be part of Peter’s master plan it will be the worst.

Survivor and queen of my heart. 

Lydia is looking in the mirror, examining the bruises on her neck as her mother talks about cover-up and hickey’s. Her mother is about to apply some make-up when Lydia stops her.

What are you doing in Beacon Hills Carol?

Lydia’s mother: If you don’t want to go to school honey you don’t have to.

Lydia: That’s not it. It’s just someone tried to strangle me and I survived. I don’t need to hide that.

I just love everything about this scene – although Lydia’s relationship with her mother comes out of nowhere but that is forgiven because it shows Lydia letting someone else in, which is as important as not wanting to cover up her scars. It’s just a perfect, simple, character moment. I love that it’s reminiscent of the moment in the first season when Lydia put on her make-up like it was war paint. She was covering the scars but now she’s not afraid to let everyone know that she’s a survivor and that’s amazing. Lydia Martin was and continues to be the best thing about this show.

This smile all the time please. 

Chris, Allison and Isaac arrive at the bank vault, it’s empty of course. Chris pulls out a cattle prod and Isaac’s like what?

This was a silly idea and you should all feel bad. 

Isaac: I thought you only used those on werewolves.

Funny you should say that Isaac because Chris is about to use it on you and even after watching the episode four times I still have no idea why this happens. Chris incapacitates Isaac with the cattle prod and then handcuffs Allison to the cage behind her.

Same Allison. 

Chris: I’m sorry but you’re just gonna have to trust me on this.

I want to Chris, I want to trust you but I don’t understand what’s happening here. Chris says something about Jennifer being in sync with the currents and then drops his gun. In walks Jennifer like the total badass that she is and I had no idea how much I was missing her this episode.

Hello my gorgeous murderess. 

Jennifer: Now this is a sacrifice.

Chris just kind of stares at Jennifer. Is she controlling him? Is he working with her? I am honestly so confused right now. Confused and strangely aroused because I could watch Chris and Jennifer stare at each other all night long. Then the chanting starts and Allison is sad and fade to black. And can some one explain to me why Chris just walked into a trap and let himself get caught without a plan to escape? IDEK! 

Stiles is explaining to Lydia about what happened at the hospital. They’re communicating again you guys and it’s beautiful.

Best friends forever! 

Lydia: I don’t believe it. Scott can’t really be with them. He can’t be.

Stiles: You didn’t see the look on his face though. It was…

Lydia: Then what can I do?

I am overwhelmed with how far Lydia has come. Look at her, believing in Scott. Offering to help. Yes Lydia. You are a hero and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Her journey this season is so similar to Scott in Season 1 and I love it.  Unfortunately she doesn’t know how to use her powers yet but that reminds her of something. When Jennifer realized she was a banshee, she was surprised. Which means that wasn’t the reason she was trying to kill her. So why did Jennifer want to kill Lydia?

Actual Hero Lydia Martin

Back at the bank vault Isaac breaks the handcuffs holding Allison, but Allison is already broken.

Allison: Why did he do that?

Break my heart why don't you Allison. 

Okay so Teen Wolf hasn’t been great with the character stuff this season but I adore the way that Stiles, Scott and finally Allison just break the moment they lose their parents. Like their last vestige of hope is tied to them and that’s just a brilliant metaphor for growing up because it suggests that despite everything that has happened there was still a part of these kids that thought their parents would be able to fix it. Losing that safety net and realizing that your parents are just people like you is a huge part of growing up and that idea is worked perfectly through this storyline.

Allison: They’re all gonna die aren’t they? 

Can we have this as friendship maybe?

Too his credit, Isaac doesn’t give her false hope, he just holds her and it’s nice. Also this a big thing for Allison to let go like that – remember Season 1 Allison hated herself for crying because she didn’t want to be ‘that girl’. Way to grow Allison, sorry about your dad.

Meanwhile at the loft. Peter is still being a confusing bastard and Derek is still determined to sacrifice himself for whatever cause he has latched onto this week. 

Peter and Derek wonder if Cora actually has any backstory.

Peter: I can understand not seeing a downside to this as you haven’t exactly been alpha of the year but think about what else you’ll be losing.

Derek: I don’t care about power. Not anymore.

Good for you Derek but I mean really, this is probably the best choice for you. You suck at being an alpha basically and you seem to enjoy being told what to do (total sub – no question). Yes Derek, I think the beta life for you. Plus is might force Jeff to write an interesting storyline that involves actual character growth rather than just excessive mangst.

Peter reminds Derek that he still has to fight Kali and if he can’t beat her as an alpha, he certainly won’t as a beta. IDK Peter that’s not a very good argument. If he’s going to lose anyway he may as well try to save Cora.

As beautiful as you are when you're sad I wouldn't mind seeing that Hoechlin smile once and a while.

Derek: I don’t care.

Peter: What if this was exactly what Jennifer was hoping for? She would know the only way for you to save Cora would be giving up your power. Maybe that’s what she was going to have you do at the hospital.

Derek: Why?

Peter: So that you wouldn’t be able to face the alpha’s without her. She wants you to come to her. It’s all part of her little seduction and she is still seducing you. She needs you on her side.

Takes one to know one Peter. But seriously, does any of that even matter do Derek at this stage? Does anything matter at all? Why are we wasting time on this storyline when the parents are in trouble?

Stiles and Lydia are at school for some reason – I’m guessing it’s because the FBI guy was already suspicious of Stiles so he needed to act like business as usual but it wouldn’t have taken more than a throw away line to tell us that. But it’s cool we totally needed to know all about real wolves healing and we definitely didn’t need to understand why Stiles has stopped trying to find his father to attend class. You need to sort out your priorities Jeff or maybe that line was in there and the director chose to cut it. Whoever’s fault it was, they need to be entered in to some kind of re-education program. 

Txt reads: Why are you at school everyone you love is dying?

Stiles gets a message, it’s from Isaac telling him that Jennifer took Chris and three cheers for Dylan’s acting because you can see his mind going through the steps and working out the implications. Jennifer has the final sacrifice, there is nothing in her way any more. He has lost his father and he’s lost Scott. His hands start shaking, a POV shot shows that his vision is blurry. The camera spins as Stiles spins and this is one of the rare moments when Teen Wolf uses slow-motion well.

Stiles: I think I’m having a panic attack. 

Dylan sometimes I just. Well done. 

Apart from Stiles announcing that he’s having a panic attack – which I am willing to forgive because some of the audience might no understand what’s happening – this is actually a pretty spot on depiction. It’s surprisingly well done, I actually felt like I with Stiles, losing control of my breath and my body. Great! A +

Chris wakes up tied up at the Nemeton with the Sheriff and Melissa. They’re both like yo what’s up, welcome to the bondage parents club. Chris sighs and laughs when he realizes where he is.

First annual bondage parents club.

Sheriff: Is it just me or has somebody been here before?

The Sheriff is snarky when he’s being held captive, I like it.

Chris starts searching his body.

Sheriff: Hate to disappoint you but we watcher her take your ankle knife.

Chris twists in the opposite direction.

Melissa: And the knife that’s in your sleeve.

Chris twists further.

Sheriff: And the switchblade in your other sleeve.

One more time Chris, wiggle for me!

Jennifer: And the Taser in your jacket pocket.

Hello my perfect goddess. 

Jennifer stands at the entrance to the root cellar, silhouetted by the sunlight streaming in. She slinks down into the cellar talking about how Argent means silver and how legend twists the truth. She kneels in front of a very cranky looking Chris and uses a cloth to wipe the blood from his forehead.

I would like to be where Chris is right now... without the potential death. Maybe I could be okay with that too.

Jennifer: What’s the Argent code again? We hunt those who hunt us. I hope you don’t mind if I borrow it for a little while since I’ve been hunted myself.

Oh no you did not just insult the code. You can kidnap him, you can tie him up (I’m pretty sure he’s in to that) and you can even take his weapons but you do not talk shit about the code to Chris! Chris does not kill innocent people, he just turns a blind eye while the rest of his family does – but he keeps to the code.

Jennifer: That’s why they call it a sacrifice. I wish it worked another way but think about what you’re doing. You are making this town, even this world, safer for your children. (looks at Melissa) Well, most of them.

Lydia pulls Stiles into the locker room hoping that maybe the memories of his half naked team mates will calm him down… I mean what? Lydia is out of her depth and Stiles is hyperventilating. He falls to the ground because he can’t breath and Lydia starts yelling at him to think about happy things like friends and family, but no not family because he doesn’t have any family left and well this is not going very well.

Lydia stop yelling at him to breath it's not helping. 

PSA: Everything that Lydia is doing is wrong – if you see someone having a panic attack please do not yell at them, or touch them and definitely don’t kiss them (seriously don’t do that okay). But this is also perfect because it’s pretty much exactly how people do react to panic attacks.

Anyway, Lydia cups her hands around Stiles face and tells him to breath but he can’t. His breaths are getting shorter and shorter. Having run out of options she leans in and kisses him. A romantic, yet uplifting pop song starts playing. Stiles is shocked at first (his eyes widening in surprise) but he eventually starts kissing Lydia back. It’s a good kiss.

I have to admit, I'm feeling things about this and they are not all bad things.

When Lydia pulls away she looks very confused and it’s perfect because she looks genuinely surprise that she enjoyed the kiss. It's not a big thing, like she's going to jump his bones. She's just surprised that there was an attraction at all and that's just everything I wanted. 

Stiles: How’d you do that?

Lydia: I read one that holding your breath could stop a panic attack. So when I kissed you… you held your breath.

Stiles: I did.

Lydia: Yeah you did.

Stiles: Thanks, that was really smart.

Fucking friendship man. 

That’s the icing on the cake for me because every emotional moment we have had before this Stiles go-to compliment has been to tell Lydia that she’s beautiful. When he talked about Lydia – he would mention that she was smart but he always started with beautiful, started with her strawberry blond hair. But not this time. And the way he looks at her when he says it, there’s love there but it’s not just romantic, it’s so much more. Like he’s just grateful to have her in his life even if he never gets to kiss her again and in that moment Stiles stopped being the ‘nice guy’.

It gets better because just when you think they’re going to ruin this perfect moment by kissing again they don’t. Lydia sits down and they’re back to the comfortable familial bond they have developed over the last season. 

Stiles and Lydia detective agency is back in play. 

Now I’ve been pretty vocally against romance between Stiles and Lydia – and I stand by the fact that it is a much more interesting as a friendship – but if this moment is the start of their romantic journey I could be okay with that. What I mean is if this is the moment that starts Lydia on a path towards maybe falling in love with Stiles in the future. It could work. Of course if this is supposed to be the love epiphany then it will suck. But there’s a 50% chance that I could actually be on board with Stydia at some stage in the future… I know I surprise myself too.

And I just have to add that Holland and Dylan were brilliant in this scene. They played it perfectly because it’s ambiguous, there’s love there but it’s not necessarily romantic love. Its just friendship with the slightly hope for something more. Brilliant. 

Lydia suggests that Stiles get some counselling, which is excellent advice but also reminds Stiles that the school councillor is actually part of the whole werewolf drama and may or may not have some cryptic information for them. So off to the guidance office they go.

Don't get in the middle of this Stiles. You'll die. 

Stiles and Lydia burst into Ms Morrell’s office without knocking and of course there is someone inside but it’s not Morrell it’s Danielle! Danielle is not giving up her much needed session for anyone. She has issues and she needs to work with them. Lydia is about to challenge her to a fight – and to be honest I’m not sure who I’d bet on there when Stiles realizes who Danielle is.

Stiles: You’re Heather’s best friend.

Danielle: I was.

Break my heart into a thousand pieces because Stiles still refers to Heather in the present tense. Stiles then decides that since Ms Morrell is late – and she’s never late so chances are she’s missing – he should probably just start going through the confidential files. Danielle (played brilliantly by fellow fangirl and generally lovely person Shantal Rhodes) tries to suggest that’s unethical but Stiles is not bothered.

They find Lydia’s file and Stiles is shocked when he sees Lydia’s drawing of a tree – the same one she’s always drawing. Lydia insists she just likes to draw trees and Danielle thinks it’s good. And Stiles is frustrated because they don’t understand, it’s literally the exact same tree. He pulls one of Lydia’s notebooks out of her bag. It’s filled with pictures of the same tree.

Same dude. 

Danielle: Okay you can have my session. You’ve got bigger issues.

You have no idea Danielle, seriously. If a psychologist ever got their hands on either of those two they would lock them up and never let got because there is a lifetime worth of best selling psychological studies right there.

Upside down. Upside down. 

Stiles turns the drawing around and oh my goodness now it makes sense. It’s not a tree, it’s the roots of a tree. Then Stiles gets it.

Stiles: It’s the Nemeton, that’s where she’s keeping them it has to be. 

Outside the office someone calls Stiles’s name. It’s the FBI guy. Stiles turns to Lydia and tells her to go to Derek because he’s been to the Nemeton before. And then I suddenly overwhelmed that Stiles is trusting Lydia to find the information and Derek to give it to her. Relationship development – Stiles circle of people that matter is slowly growing. 

I am obsessed with Dylan's eyebrows in this episode. 

FBI guy tells Stiles that they found the Sheriff’s car in the parking lot. He’s officially missing. The FBI guy takes Stiles into an empty class room to have a chat because he knows Stiles is hiding something.

Sad feelings about sad things. 

Stiles: So you’re asking me to tell you what I wouldn’t not tell you?

God damn it I love it when Stiles is a little shit.

Stiles: I don’t know how to help you help me tell you something that would help you if I don’t know it.

Stiles really does not like this guy.

FBI Guy: Where are your other friends?

Stiles: You mean Scott.

No he means, Scott and Isaac and Allison and apparently the alpha twins because they are all a part of his clique and none of them turned up and school today (possibly because they had a big orgy the night before).

FBI Guy: Stiles come on. There’s been a pretty disturbing amount of violent activity in this county in the last few months. Several murders tied to this school. I don’t know what’s going here but it’s serious… hey your dad is missing.

I do not like you sir.

Well I don’t know who you are Mr FBI man but you made Stiles cry so you are not on my list. I don’t know what exactly is going to happen to the people on my list but I don’t think that it will be good. FBI guy is going to leave but he doesn’t want to leave Stiles alone.

These older men need to stop wandering around school grounds. 

Deaton: He’s with me.

Yeah totally, let the underage teenage boy in an emotional fragile state go home with the town vet who just wandered on to school grounds without reason again. That’s completely acceptable.

Kill him with fire Lydia, it'll be poetic.

Lydia arrives at Derek’s loft, Peter opens the door and I sigh because we know that this scene was tacked on because Jeff completely forgot about the fact that Peter spent most of Season 2 emotional abusing Lydia in a narrative that had serious undertones of sexual abuse.

So much emotion with one look. 

Holland and Ian – to their credit – actually do a pretty good job with what they're given. Lydia looks scared then determined and Peter has a flicker of shame that is quickly covered by his usual snarky mask. But most of the positive aspects of this moment are ruined by the music and that’s surprising because the music direction for Teen Wolf is usually exceptional. Whoever decided it was a good idea to put the humorous music in this scene should be shot. It’s disgusting and actually quite jarring against the way Holland and Ian played the scene.

Oh hey, it's night time. 

Morrell is running through the woods – and suddenly it’s night. Does anyone actually understand the timeline of this episode or should I just stop trying? She’s being chased by the Alpha’s because why not right?

Scott’s hanging out with Deucalion and they spot a firefly and Scott reminds us that in the first episode all the animals were going crazy, and it all makes sense because it was actually all the Darach’s fault. I am seriously getting sick of everyone in this episode explaining that everything is significant – if we don’t understand that there’s a connection then there is no connection and it was not necessary.

Yes Scott he's still evil. 

Scott: Does she scare you?

Deucalion: She concerns me if she’s willing to kill that many innocent people for her cause. People like your mother and Stiles’s father.

Scott: Are you willing to kill innocent people?

Deucalion: I’ll kill any living thing that gets in my way.

Am I the only one that thinks Deucalion is the least threatening big bad ever? Because what has he done really. He killed the girl in episode one – which was a good start and then he killed one his own pack (but Ennis was unconscious so it wasn’t exactly a fair fight). Kali killed Erica and Boyd. Kali is the one that Jennifer/Julia seems to be after. Kali is the one that’s always doing the fighting? Why isn’t Kali in charge? Kali would be a much more interesting villain. Deucalion is just like another Scott obsessed dickhead, which granted Scott is totally swoon worthy but still. What’s his end game? Scott? Then what?

The point is that – like the whole mess that was “Visionary” – you could pretty much delete Deucalion from this story and it would still make sense. That’s not what you want from a key villain. BTW I think Gideon Emery is great as Deucalion, I just think the character is entirely redundant.

Is Derek mute? Why is Peter doing all the talking? 

Back at the loft Lydia is questioning Peter and Derek but they don’t know where the Nemeton is because Talia – who is apparently Peter’s older sister – took the memories from them.

Morrell is still running but the wonder twins are catching up to her. She reaches a clearing stops throws some mountain ash in the air and it makes a perfect circular barrier around her. And there you go fan fiction writers that is now canon!

Mountain ash powers! 

The twins – and Kali – do some slow motion tumbling because it’s been a while since they had any of that and then Morrell is surrounded. Deucalion and Scott strut in and then the party can get started.

Deucalion seems vaguely amused by the whole thing and Morrell knew that they would come for her because she is the same as Jennifer and they fear her power. Kali says that they do so with good reason – Morrell was the one that sent The Girl from the first episode and god damn it Jeff please stop throwing in these lines trying to convince us that it all makes sense because it doesn’t. It doesn’t make sense. Whatever Kali just wants to know about Jennifer and Morrell thinks Scott should run along home and play with his friends.

Deucalion: He can decide what’s right for himself.

Alpha pack + Scott.

Damn straight he can. If anyone knows what’s right, it’s Scott McCall. But not without all the information.

Morrell: Have you told him everything you’ve done? How you’ve piled up bodies in a narcissistically psychotic effort to form your perfect pack.

Umm didn’t we already know he was a murderer? I thought that’s why Scott was so anti him?

Morrell: Bodies that include Ennis by the way.

Her boss killed the guy she murdered everyone she loved for... but it's cool.

Kali looks and Deucalion and wait, that’s it? That’s all the reaction we get? You’re telling me that you went through the whole, pretending Derek killed Ennis debacle for that? I thought for sure it would result in Kali turning on Deucalion and taking her rightful crown as queen Alpha before being ultimately killed in a murder/suicide by Jennifer/Julia? I have got to stop getting my hopes up about this show.

Deucalion says he’s lying then throws his spear/cane at Morrell hitting her in the shoulder and pushing her out of the mountain ash circle. Scott rushes for like the hero that he is and put himself between Morrell and the rest of the alphas.

Scott: You can't hurt her because of reasons. 

Scott: I’m not going to let them kill you.

Of course you’re not Scott but how to do plan on doing that? By asking them oh okay then? It was very nice of them to just back off when Scott told them to. Is this some kind of special true alpha power? Anyway Morrell tells Scott that the parents are at the Nemeton, wherever that is.

Speaking of the Nemeton, let’s check in on the parents shall we. Chris is still trying to wiggle himself free and Melissa is enjoying the show.

Melissa: I don’t want to kill your optimism or anything but the both of us have been trying to do the exact same thing for hours.

Sherriff: You been tied up before?

This is fun for him. You know it. 

Has Chris been tied up before? I think you’re referring to every Friday night at the Argent abode. Oh come on, as if Victoria and Chris weren’t into that. They totally were and it was hot but the poor innocent Sheriff doesn’t think of such things.

Sheriff: What is that part of being a werewolf hunter?

Chris is like, yeah hunter stuff, let’s go with that. Also the Sheriff knows about supernatural stuff! YAY!

Perfect woman being perfect under extreme pressure. 

Melissa: I tried to download him on as much as I could.

Sheriff: I was starting to feel a little bit left out.

When this is over, the parents should have like weekly meet ups where they just make snarky remarks about raising the local Scooby gang. Maybe they could go bowling.

Then all the lovely snarky banter takes a turn for the emotional because Chris says that the Sheriff must have known, he just wasn’t ready to believe and I’m just going to post this speech here because it’s beautiful (I will be forever sad that so many amazing character moments had to happen in this clusterfuck of an episode).

Three cheers for Linden! 

Sheriff: You’re right. There was a nigh eight years ago. The night my wife died. I was at the end of a shift and a call came in. There had been a pile up and a young woman, she was a teenager actually, she was trapped under an overturned car. We had to wait for the paramedics, we were never getting her out but I was able to hold her hand. She knew she was going to die but I just kept telling her no listen, the paramedics are on their way. And I remember her hand suddenly gripped mine so tightly that I, I literally though she was gonna break the bones. And she looked me in the eye and she said, ‘if you want to be with her, go now’. And I knew she was talking about my wife. Then that other part of my brain, the part that looks for clues, for finger prints, for logical connections. That part told me that there is no way that this girl could possibly know about Claudia. And so I stayed, I stayed until the paramedics pulled her out, till her heart stopped beating and they declared her dead and when I finally got to the hospital I saw Stiles sitting in the waiting room with his head in his hands. He was with Claudia when she died but I wasn’t. I wasn’t with her because I didn’t believe. I just did not believe.

This is lovely and it gives us some great insight into the Sheriff and his wife – who we now know is called Claudia and of course Stiles. It works in the context as well because I’m pretty sure the parents are preparing to die, I think that was a story he needed to tell. Unfortunately the pacing of this episode is all over the place so it feels a little tacked on but it was a beautiful moment nonetheless. Especially the looks of understanding from Chris and Melissa.

Research! 

At Deaton’s Stiles in research mode because if he stops he’s going to have another panic attack. They’re trying to work out where the Nemeton is; they figure it has to be on the telluric currents – because in case you forgot, science. Finally Deaton jumps in – there might be a way but they are going to need Scott.  That’s too bad because Scott left with the Alpha pack so it’s going to be hard to get him away from them… oh wait no. They can just call him and ask him to meet them apparently.

Deaton and Stiles meet Scott in the woods. Stiles asks if Scott is going to tell Deucalion what they find and Scott’s like well I did kind of promise. Deaton suggests they concentrate on finding the parents first suggesting there is a last minute solution to all their problems which will be revealed next week. Anyway the gist of the plan is that Scott, Allison and Stiles need to act as surrogate sacrifices.

Stiles better not die Deaton. 

Scott: We die for them?

Stiles: But he can bring us back. (to Deaton) You can bring us back right?

Yeah Deaton you can bring them back right? Because I have grown attached to these assholes and I am not ready to let any of them go just yet okay.

Deaton: This is a dangerous thing for more reasons than one.  You’ll be giving power back to the Nemeton, a place that hasn’t had power for a long time. This kind of power is like a magnet, it attracts the supernatural. The kind of things that a family like the Argents can fill the pages of a bestiary with. It will draw them here. Like a Beacon.

So basically they are turning Beacon Hills into a hell mouth. This is either the best or worst thing ever. It could be too much freedom and they kind of lost control of the story this season, too much freedom could make it worse. But if they remember that this show is essentially a coming-of-age narrative and they tie all the supernatural encounters to that then it could be awesome.

Stiles: That doesn’t sound any worse than anything we’ve already seen.

Deaton: You’d be surprised at what you have yet to see.

But that’s not everything because apparently if they do this it will have an effect on them. They won’t be able to see it but there will feel it. There will be a darkness on their hearts for the rest of their lives, like a permanent scar. Again if this is tied to the coming-of-age story and works as a metaphor for growing up and losing childhood innocence then I am 100% behind it. If it’s literal I will have to buy another bottle of gin. 

The weight of the world is on that boys shoulders. 

Scott: Like a tattoo.

And that’s I can’t take it anymore. I am sick of this episode trying to convince me that everything that happened in the first episode is actually connected to what is happening now. You can’t just tell me that it’s connected without actually showing me why it’s connected or more importantly why it matters that it’s connected. Seriously, most of this episode has been people saying “you see that thing that happened that you thought was completely pointless is actually ever-so-slightly connected to the things that are happening right now”. Except it’s not working because all it does is draw attention to just how pointless so much of this season was.

Pro tip: If you need to spell out why things matter then they don’t matter and should not have existed!

We have a plan that negates the other plan.

Meanwhile at the Nemeton – Chris finally pulls something out of his ass. It’s a mini ultra-sonic-emitter. He turns it on to see if it will alert the werewolves to their position. If it does it kind of renders whatever Scott, Stiles and Allison are about to do pointless but it doesn’t even matter.

Back at the loft – Cora is still dying and Derek is about to give up his alpha power to save her.

Derek's sad for something new and different.

Derek: It’s got to be now, I don’t have a choice.

Peter: You always have a choice. It’s whether or not you can live with the consequences.

That’s actually pretty good advice Derek, in this instance it’s probably better to give up your alpha power rather than letting your sister die. Even though I am not invested in this relationship at all I know that her dying is not going to be a good thing. Anyway, the lunar eclipse is coming so you’ll all be equally powerless and Allison will kill everyone and live happily ever after with Lydia. The end.

Pack feels! 

At the animal clinic, Deaton, Isaac and Lydia are preparing ice-baths with mint for Scott, Allison and Stiles. They each had to bring something significant to their parent. Stiles brought his dad’s badge, which he had tried to flatten out after Jennifer crush it. Allison brought a ceremonial silver bullet her dad made when he finished his hunter training and Scott brought the watch his dad gave his mom when she first got hired at the hospital.

McCall family problems. 

Scott: She used to say it was the only thing in her marriage that ever worked.

They have to get in the tub and be held down but the person that holds them down has to have a strong connection to them. They have to be an emotional tether.

Not going to lie the best part of this episode is when Lydia instinctually moves towards Allison when Deaton says that the person that they need shave a strong connection because the only pair that has a stronger connection than Lydia and Allison is Scott and Stiles. I will be forever crying about this beautiful female friendship.

Then Deaton says that Lydia has to go with Stiles and that’s when things get awkward because it means that Allison is going to have to go with Isaac. This is awkward because Scott doesn’t yet know that Allison and Isaac have any kind of connection. Graciously Scott says that it’s okay because he would never want to get in the way of either Allison or Isaac’s happiness.

She isn't yours to give up Scott and she hasn't been for a while. 

Look I understand why they had to pair them together like this – it’s the only way that worked. Because Scott had to be with Deaton and Stiles doesn’t have any connection to Isaac really but I’m a bit disappointed that it wasn’t Allison and Lydia together. Two woman tethered to each other, that would have been powerful. Also I know Jeff keeps saying that he’s not going with a love triangle but it still feels like a love triangle. Actually it feels like a threeway relationship and they have negotiated the dynamics yet but apparently Scott’s okay with Allison and Isaac doing their own thing this one time. My favourite part of the whole event is how offended Lydia looks – I’m not sure what she’s more offended by though: Allison and Isaac hurting her new hero Scott or the fact that Allison didn’t tell her she was in the middle of werewolf sandwich. It was probably the latter.

There’s a lot of slow motion as they walk up the bathtubs and lower themselves in. Very disappointed that no one takes their shirt off. Isaac had to take his shirt off. Dammit Teen Wolf, I wants my gratuitous manflesh! Once their sitting in the bath tub Stiles looks at Scott.

BTW Plot Twist. 

Stiles: By the way, if I don’t make it back and you do, you should probably know something. Your dad’s in town.

What, WHAT WHAT!?!?!? Turns out, FBI guy is actually Scott’s dad and suddenly it all makes so much sense. No wonder Stiles was such an ass to him. Scott does not look very happy about this but I guess that’s because it’s a lot to take in. I mean he just found out his boyfriend might be sleeping with his ex-girlfriend and now his deadbeat dad is in town. Poor Scott.

NGL I care for you even less now. 

Cut to FBI Guy who is now Agent McCall. He’s sitting in Scott’s room, crying. A Tale of Two Cities is lying open on the floor. Oh Jeff your subtly isn’t getting any better is it?

That's it honey, show me them baby blues. 

Also Derek is drawing the pain out of Cora, it does not look like a pleasant experience. She wakes up, Derek growls and his eyes turn from red to blue. Zoom of doom on Peter, whatever that means.

Original McCall pack feelings. 

Scott, Allison and Scott look at each other before they slink under the water and I am just having so many pack feels about these three being connected and sacrificing themselves for their parents. They submerge.

To be continued…