Shipping News: Once Upon so many lesbians I don’t know where to look, gay purgatory update and more

Well I’m running a bit behind, I know, I suck. But my friends have been shipping me with a social life, which is causing some problems with my fangirling schedule. Anyway enough with the excuses I really just want to talk about Once Upon a Time, Supernatural and The Vampire Diaries (with a little bit of Glee).

Once Upon a Time, we need to talk about the elephant in the room because for a show with zero queer characters you certainly have a lot of lesbians. Seriously though Xena called they want their subtext back. I realize that I am often accused of seeing rainbows everywhere (I blame university) but was everyone else watching the interactions between Ruby and Belle? I mean every time Belle looks at Ruby she looks like a teenager in love plus the whole werewolf thing fits with the Beauty and the Beast fairytale. I know I’ve seen a few people on Tumblr refer to this ship as Red Bells but I’m going for “Rebel” – because these ladies are badass.

There was also a little something happening between Red and Snow (Ruby/Red might just take over Emma as queen lesbian) but I like them more as friends. That said I just really want Ruby to get some loving and seeing as all the guys she flirts with end up dead it might be time for her to try a different tactic.

Before any het shippers get angry at me, yes I still love Rumbelle and Snow x Charming (do they have a ship name? The Charmings?) but there wasn’t really much to discuss about the het romances in the recent eps – apart from the growing popularity of Captain Swan. The reason I love this show is because the women are just a cut above the men – the men are kind of incidental (which is a nice change). Of course, when they spend a lot of time fleshing out female characters and their relationships with each other shipping happens… come on we’ve been doing it with the boys for years you can’t get pissy when the gender is reversed. Femslash is taking over, shhh just come.

Then again, I do still love the boys (equal opportunity objectification on this blog)… so let’s talk about Supernatural because it has out slashed itself this week. Last week there was a bunch of Wincest angst (with added Benny) but this week was all about the Destiel. First you have Dean seeing Cas all over the place, which parallels the way that Sam would see Jess in the first season (it’s a metaphor for purgatory sex). Of course it turns out Dean is not going crazy from missing his boyfriend, Cas is really back. Cue epic eye sex and angsty half conversations where no one actually admits that the all their problems could be fixed if they just admitted that they love each other.

Basically Dean is mad at Cas because how did he get out so easily? And Cas is just happy to see Dean but disappointed to find that he has gone back to his emotionally stunted pre-purgatory self so there will be no more affectionate touching or expressions of love (or sex). Turns out, Dean has been remembering things with guilt covered glasses, Dean didn’t leave Cas behind, Cas chose to stay in purgatory because he learnt from the Dean school of self-hate.  The weirdest part was that Cas and Dean actually discussed their emotions – explaining their actions so that the other could not jump to any conclusions. It was almost healthy… which just makes it that much worse when the plot twist happens (if you don’t know what I’m talking about go watch the episode).

Also Kevin Tran: Advanced Placement is back and he’s still heterosexual as witness through the way he looked at the sexy teenage bitch witch.

Moving away from all things slash (well not all things but most things) let’s talk about The Vampire Dairies because they have caught the break up fever that is ripping through November sweeps. It’s not looking great for the show’s two biggest couples – which of course means good things for other shippers.

Caroline and Tyler’s break up might have been a performance but it seems that (fictional) life is imitating art because by the end of the episode it looked like they were breaking up for real. I guess it makes sense, he’s got a sexy werewolf bbf living at his house and she let one of his friends be sacrificed for the greater good (oh and she agreed to go out with the guy he hates more than anything). It would take some kind of mutant super couple to make it through that many issues.

Speaking of mutant super couples, it looks like it’s finally splitsville for Stefan and Elena… again. It never lasts that long so I’m not paying it much heed – I’m just hoping it sticks long enough for Delena sex. Ignoring that, it was a legitimate conversation that needed to be had, Elena has changed even if neither of them are willing to admit it and sometimes just loving someone isn’t enough to keep a relationship going. Of course they did kind of hint that if Elena was to become human again then all their problems would be fixed (but I think maybe it will all be fixed once Elena works out the URST with Damon – with a hot steamy session of vampire sex).

For me the big issue is that now Caroline and Stefan are both single… which one is Klaus going to choose? I’m not ashamed to admit that this is the love triangle that I really care about. It’s okay though because I have the perfect solution. I ship Klaus with Caroline, but I also ship Caroline with Stefan and Stefan with Klaus – OT3 please! Come on I would watch a show all about Klaus, Caroline and Stefan being in a three-way relationship. Especially if it was a sitcom, and they all lived together. Hilarity would totally ensue!

Finally let’s have a quick Glee check in because I really don’t care anymore. Basically, Finn and Blaine are even more annoying single then they were in when they were in awful relationships. Klaine are officially broken up, Rachel still has more sexual tension with Cassandra July than she has with either of her male suitors and Brittana are the healthiest relationship on the show even after breaking up. Also the aforementioned Miss July bedded down with the ex-Australian idol reject I still refuse to believe is not and there is absolutely zero chemistry between the lovely Marley and The Glee Project winner (not bothering to learn his name – he’s too bland).

Well that’s all for this week – I’ve been out of the loop fandom wise so no news on that front and I promise I will talk about 00Q as soon as I see the movie. Until then, don’t forget to send me any shipping news (and let me know if you want me to talk about your fav couple – even if I don’t ship it I can usually find something shippy to discuss).

Til next time – what were your fav shippy moments of the week? Are you excited or are you in tears because of spoilers?